I wish you knew who you were and how much I have wanted to thank you for something that was only part of your job.
You are the reason I am alive and breathing today. That was one pretty distressing night for me two June’s ago and the way you picked me up and helped to brush me off unjudgmentally has stayed with me since. I value people who are truly authentic and caring very much. I have seen you around my university campus, at events where police presence is important to show support for students. I’ve wanted and attempted to speak to you, to thank you but I’ve always stopped or questioned myself. How do you start ghats conversation?
“Thanks for stopping me from killing myself” ?
“Thanks for giving a shit” ?
You were kind, unjudgmental, and cared. I could see it in your eyes as you handed me one of your cigarettes saying “you smoke right? It must be a pretty stressful night for ya, have one of mine, let’s go”.
You didn’t stop there, and you didn’t pry. You just said “do you know why you feel this way?” When I responded with “yes”, you continued to say “you know your counsellor Lesley, she can handle whatever you have to say ya know, you can confide in her, you can and will get better”.
I needed to hear that two June’s ago. I needed someone like you to call me sweetheart and to apologise “for being such a Mum”.
I was isolated in that city, so tired of fighting and you cared enough to try.
Thank you for “being such a mum”, for giving a shit, for that cigarette and pep talk.
Thank you for stopping me from killing myself.
Thank you for being there and being you.
You saved my life and you helped me to save my own life.